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I feel so stuck in this house. There's no where I can go without feeling totally out of place. I wanna be out doing something, but all my friends are house bound fron like six pm ... and If I go somewhere by myslef I will just end up looking like a loner freak who noone can be assed to go out with... I haven't found anybody yet who will just be there for me, and be there whenever I need them (i know that sounds really selfish, but thats what I need right now.) hopefully I'll think of somewhere I can go and just be, even if it is by myself.


I was literally force fed a cheese sandwhich and chocolate biscuit by my pushy grandparents last night and I feel totally gross now......
I feel really disapointed in myself for not having the courage just to shout at them to go away, but then my dad would kill me!
Shopping this afternoon with some friends, so hopefully shopping burns alot of calories???
anyways hoping today goes better than yesterday! ABC will have to wait until I get back to normal school routine (tommorow)
<3 <3


Ana Boot Camp.... I can so do this!!!!
Just need to calculate the cals in advance for all the food im gonna eat ......
xx <3

I just feel like crying.

I am just so tired of none of my friends talking to me, they just ignore me and talk about me behind my back. My family are so stupid sometimes, and they don't understand. something's missing and how can I get better when i'm still fat?! Nothing is woring out, and I still feel fat from yesterday's binge.
But the good thing is I haven't felt like eating all day so another run is called for :)

XXX please, if any one can talk to me xXXX

Binged all yesterday, fasting today!

I am new to this thing, so not sure where to start!
ummm... Im feeling so frustrated at myself for what i ate yesterday, so i'm trying to make up for that today. Went for a long run this morning, but i can still feel the food in my stomach . urghhh! it's disguisting!
I will probably be fasting for the next couple of days to lose the weight i must of put on yesterday.




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April 2009


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